Holding On

[b][color=red]I’m trying to hold on.
Watch me and see it’s all a façade.
That sunny glow, it’s just a show.
A disguise I made so you don’t have to know,
I don’t really have it altogether.

Don’t get me wrong, I’d love to be rescued.
I’d love to have a friend by my side, or maybe two.
But it’s just too risky, to let someone in,
To lay myself out and reveal all my sins.

I’m holding on, hanging by a thin thread.
I’m trying to breathe while life washes over my head.
Helplessly, my head bobbles in the ever changing currents.
I fake a response whenever the situation warrants.
Just to keep up an image, to hide the fact that I’m damaged.

After all, who would want someone broken?
Who would want to take from one who has had so much taken?
Suffocating. Disengaging. Silently raging.
Flaunting a lie so you don’t have to ask if I’m alright.
It’s okay. I’ll find a resolve on my own.

I’m holding on, waiting for someone to trust.
Praying they’ll come soon before my bubbles burst.
Hoping they’ll find me underneath all this thurst.
I’m running out of time. I’m running of air.
I’m waiting for someone who would care
Enough to pull me out without questions or stares.

I’m holding on, buying time to heal,
So I don’t have a breakdown whenever I try to comprehend how I feel.
I’m trying to keep it together, without any glue.
I’m trying to move on because…that’s what I should do?
I’m holding on, trying to understand,
How I got to where I am.

I’m wondering now if I’ll make it,
If I’ll find a solution if I continue to fake it.
I’m wondering now if it’s really worth it,
If I should just come out and spill it.

I don’t want to find out how long I can hold on
Because then what happens?
Will that finally quiet this storm?
Will I get a chance to start anew, slash and burn?
Or will the past just repeat and create a pattern? [/color][/b]

[quote="cool66616"][b][color=red]I’m trying to hold on.
Watch me and see it’s all a façade.
That sunny glow, it’s just a show.
A disguise I made so you don’t have to know,
I don’t really have it altogether.

Don’t get me wrong, I’d love to be rescued.
I’d love to have a friend by my side, or maybe two.
But it’s just too risky, to let someone in,
To lay myself out and reveal all my sins.

I’m holding on, hanging by a thin thread.
I’m trying to breathe while life washes over my head.
Helplessly, my head bobbles in the ever changing currents.
I fake a response whenever the situation warrants.
Just to keep up an image, to hide the fact that I’m damaged.

After all, who would want someone broken?
Who would want to take from one who has had so much taken?
Suffocating. Disengaging. Silently raging.
Flaunting a lie so you don’t have to ask if I’m alright.
It’s okay. I’ll find a resolve on my own.

I’m holding on, waiting for someone to trust.
Praying they’ll come soon before my bubbles burst.
Hoping they’ll find me underneath all this thurst.
I’m running out of time. I’m running of air.
I’m waiting for someone who would care
Enough to pull me out without questions or stares.

I’m holding on, buying time to heal,
So I don’t have a breakdown whenever I try to comprehend how I feel.
I’m trying to keep it together, without any glue.
I’m trying to move on because…that’s what I should do?
I’m holding on, trying to understand,
How I got to where I am.

I’m wondering now if I’ll make it,
If I’ll find a solution if I continue to fake it.
I’m wondering now if it’s really worth it,
If I should just come out and spill it.

I don’t want to find out how long I can hold on
Because then what happens?
Will that finally quiet this storm?
Will I get a chance to start anew, slash and burn?
Or will the past just repeat and create a pattern? [/color][/b][/quote]

[b]I seem to glance outside
From my windowsill
As people pass me by
And life turns like a mill
Hold on for a second!
No single life awaits
I'm drained and I'm exhausted
Can't keep up with the pace
Curse this weakness!
This long and bumpy road
Hold on time! Slow down!
My pleas are but ignored
I long to be a part
Of the usual crowd that moves
But time just keeps on going
The more I try to prove
I'm trying to catch up
If I can grab the time
Still the crowd seems getting smaller
As my world gets left behind.
[/b]